9/17/2011 - Ran my first marathon.
9/17/2014 - Sat in the orthopedic doctor’s office to find out what’s really going on with my leg; wondered if I’d ever be able to run again; sulked.
You feel alone, as though you are the only one walking in a dense fog that somehow weighs like a ton of bricks. It hurts to move, it is suffocating to continue, and you feel so hollow and alone. It is in these moments that you need to hold onto the promise of tomorrow, it’s scary right now, but fear doesn’t last forever, even though it feels like it will. I hope that you find the courage to set your sails north, to look up and see the stars guiding you home. Beloved, you are not alone, even though the silence is unbearable, just know that someone is trying to yell into the void hoping to reach your ears.
I hope you find land soon, because you have been doing this on your own for so long, and I care for you. I care if you make it back to the ones you love, that you won’t just drift off into the unknown, but that you somehow make your way back to the places that know your name.
This journey is long, but it will end, and it will be a good ending, not one where you are left empty and used, but one where you are filled and loved. I hope you are brave enough to turn the pages, to keep reading the story of your life, because it’s far greater than you may think it is… Someone loves this story enough to write it, and each word brings new meaning to your life. So keep going, and may you learn to love this story as much as the stars love to shine.
T.B. LaBerge // You Matter
I’m glad I came across this. I’m not really one to talk about the stuff that goes on in my own head (lol.. I’m a therapist)… but I’m just really glad this person could say it for me.
First day of Whole30 and my niece comes to my office with a chocolate chip cookie for me that was as big as her face.
She put it next to her face for comparison purposes.
EDIT: I’m Whole30’ing to see if those anti-inflammatory claims are true because I’m at a total loss for what to do otherwise for my still aching leg. And also because I need some structure, as usual.
Anonymous said: So is the 5n5 Challenge over?
I suppose it is. The idea was to end on Labor Day.
I didn’t meet my goal. I only lost 3 pounds (goal was 13).
I could call this a major fail, but I hadn’t planned on getting injured (who ever does?) or taking so long for the injury to improve (it’s getting there… slowly). It’s hard to get anything done when it hurts to walk or even adjust your leg.
A lot of people joined in on the fun and hopefully were motivated to make some progress so I’ll count it as a success even though I didn’t get the results I’d hoped for myself.
Someone asked me to do a Friday Five two weeks ago and I am just now getting around to it.
1.) I contract services with a company that is really dedicated to both physical and mental health. Anyway.. a few of their staff have these desk chairs and I’ve even given consideration to the benefits (since a standing desk isn’t an option here) but even I can’t look at them without a chuckle.
2.) Decent week on the food front. In the spirit of honesty of 5n5, I’ve not really made a lot of progress, but I’ve not gained. I wasn’t really counting on this injury taking so long to heal. BUT.. it’s felt much, much better for the past few days.
3.) I’m kind of embarrassed about how into Big Brother I’ve been this year.
4.) A new(ish) friend said last night that they think I’m an introvert. I seriously laughed out loud.
5.) I’ve spent too long trying to think of a #5 and I’ve got nuthin’ so I’m leaving this open for you, the reader, to ask a question and maybe I’ll answer the best ones?
Tonight at CrossFit I got so sweaty that my shoes were wet when I got home.
@forgettheumbrella tagged me in this forever ago and I forgot about it in my drafts so here. I’m not going to tag anyone or write any new questions so whatever.. do what you want. You’re (hopefully) adults.
Describe your typical morning routine.
Hit snooze. A lot. Today it was about 10 times.
MondaysTuesdays, amirite? Shower and all that. Hit up Dunkin’ for coffee on the way to work. They know me there. And I them. It’s even to the point that I know who will be working based on the cars in the parking lot. A couple weeks ago I forgot my wallet at home and didn’t realize it until I’d already ordered in the drive-thru. I told the lady I needed to cancel my order and she said, “Eh, I know you’re good for it” and let me have the coffee for FREE.
If you could instantly be excellent at something without doing ANY work, what would you choose? [writing? painting? surfing? rockclimbing? etc]
Navigating social situations. I kind of hate being so introverted and painfully awkward.
What is your biggest pet peeve?
Lying. I really, really hate when someone just tells blatant lies.
What is one of your favorite memories from your childhood?
I wish I had vivid memories of childhood but it’s just kind of blurry. In general, just spending a lot of time in our backyard above ground swimming pool with my family making up names for the “dives” we did in to 4’ of water. Why limit oneself to a cannonball?
If you could travel anywhere in the world RIGHT NOW, where would you go?
Nowhere specific. Just somewhere with nice beaches. And maybe mountains too.
Favorite drinking game? And if you’re not into drinking games, favorite alcoholic beverage? And if you’re not into drinking alcohol, favorite type of dog?
Dogs aren’t my thing. I’m not an animal person. That probably disqualifies me for Tumblr but tbh I didn’t read the terms of service. And I pretty much quit drinking a little while ago when I realized I’m getting old and I hate the way I feel the next (few) day(s). But when I was into the drinking game thing, I liked Captain Dickhead. Or F*** the Dealer. Or, even better, just playing Cards Against Humanity while drinking.
What is your favorite thing about the city/town that you live in?
It’s quaint? I dunno. A lot of people hate it but it’s grown on me in the last year or so. I think I’m just made to live here. For now anyway.
How do you relax after a long and stressful day?
What is your favorite movie of all time?
It’s so bro-y, but Super Troopers makes me laugh just as hard today as it did the first time I saw it. Also The Sandlot. And The Goonies. I am a big child is what I am trying to say.
If you know someone has anxiety and you do not have anxiety, it’s best if you just believe them. Asking them every single time “Why do you have a problem with that?” is basically commanding them to feel worse.
- My friend LH (reposted and not reblogged because of reasons)
But mm-hmmm…. see below for one of my many anxieties.